What are you patriotic for?

“I told the Bosnian record collectors that when I thought of the records of these Memphis men, when I looked out the window at the Mississippi mud and felt their names moistening my tongue what I felt, what I was proud to feel, was patriotic”.

Patriotism has always been a tricky subject for me: my parents hailed from China, I was born in Canada, but I spent most of my life in America. Even after spending about 13-14 years of my life in America, I’ve never felt particularly patriotic for America. I’ve also never felt particularly patriotic for China. During the Olympics, my parents would cheer on for China, but I haven’t always felt particularly connected to China. My sister and I would cheer China on with our parents, but I don’t think we felt the same patriotism for China that our parents felt, I think we cheered on China because our parents did. I don’t know why I never felt patriotic for America; maybe it was because my parents didn’t really understand American holidays so we never celebrated them; maybe it was because my parents didn’t want me to forget my Chinese roots. Whatever the reason, I don’t really feel patriotic for America. It’s tough for immigrants to raise children because they don’t want their children to forget their roots, but they also want their children to fit in, so immigrant children are kind of stuck in the middle in many instances. My parents did their best to raise me to remember my roots and fit in with people here, but it’s impossible to fully accept two cultures, so sometimes I’ll feel stuck in the middle of two worlds. I love China because of my parents, but I also love America because it’s been my home for most of my life. There’s no grey area for patriotism, and I don’t want to be patriotic for two countries because that seems fake to the other country, so I can only remain impartial to all countries. For now. Maybe that’ll change when I’m older.